BJ (be jey) –n. a blowjob; oral sex performed on a man.
The only thing on my bucket list is to get a BJ while eating a PB&J.
Jailbait (jeyl-beyt) -n. a girl under the legal age of content for sexual intercourse.
I only flirt with jailbait for the satisfaction of rejecting the type of girls who rejected me when I was their age.
Shithead (shit-hed) -n. an incompetent, contemptible person; a stupid jerk.
Hey shithead, stop pissing in our shower.
Asshole (as-hohl) -n. 1. the anus. 2. a contemptible, detestable person. 3. the worst part of an object or location.
The golden rule revised: Just don’t be an asshole and you’re golden.
Wad (wod) –n. the amount of cum emitted by a male’s orgasm.
I sorry, but “shoot your wad in me” just doesn’t sound sexy no matter how you say it.
Foreskin (fawr-skin) -n. the fold of skin that covers the tip of the penis; prepuce.
How did God came up with the no foreskin rule for his chosen people?
Cunt rag (kuhnt rag) –n. 1. a tampon or sanitary napkin used for vaginal hygiene during the menstrual cycle. 2. an obnoxious loser; douchebag.
I had to move my couch across the room because my landlord is a cunt rag and the roof still leaks.
Renob (rey-nob) -n. 1. an erection that suddenly becomes flaccid, a limp penis. 2. a moron. (taken from boner spelled backwards.)
If Dave wasn’t such a renob maybe he wouldn’t have backed his truck into the marina.
Pop a nut (pop a nuht) -v. to ejaculate.
Are you telling me I’m only guy in the room who didn’t pop a nut in Melissa over the weekend?
Shaft (shahft) -n. the area on an erect penis from the base to, but not including, the head.
All I want to do is wrap my lips around your shaft and suck you like a melting popsicle.
Boobies (boob-es) -n. breasts, tits.
I’ve never gotten over my adolescent fascination with boobies and I pray I never do.
Flash (flash) -v. to expose the genitals or breasts suddenly and briefly to an individual or in public.
Some perv flashed us in the park, but ran off crying when we laughed.
Go down (goh doun) -v. to perform oral sex on a man or woman.
I don’t mind when Melissa is on the rag, it’s the only time all month she goes down on me.
Roger (roj-er) -v. to have anal sex.
Just once I’d like to read a work of 007 fan fiction that doesn’t end with a henchman getting rogered by James Bond.
Mack (mak) -v. 1. to hit on; flirt with someone. 2. to make out.
Dave spent the whole night macking on this cutie, then her boyfriend showed up at last call.